Tuesday 4 February 2014

The Times They Are A-Changin'


31.1.14.

Yes, Comrades

Having gotten a late night and an early rise to ensure the rented car got back to Phoenix in time, us three weren't feeling at our most beautiful. Trying to sleep in a car is murder, I almost feel sorry for people who have to live in their Vauxhall Novas, with their tonic wine and "I am mental" bumper sticker.

When we arrived back, Mr Nancy and X took the rented car back while I dealt with my essentials. Mama Sheba was dropped off and since I smelled like St. Savile's Childrens' Hospital, I spent some time chipping some off the old block. When we got back into one group, our first destination was Fry's Electronics. Snickers ice cream had perked me up by this point, Nancy said "Godzilla! My niggah..." I laughed, we went in, then left for Chandler.

At Zias, she got two movies and a Gin Blossoms album for me, which was sweet. At Chandler Mall, my static shocks were in full swing. At the classiest chocolate shop, See's, Nancy got a bag of stuff, but I'd had a Po' Boy sandwich earlier which was a pound of three meats, so I was cushty.

One final stop at Wal Mart yielded a nice surprise. Before that though, we were hunting for Airheads after my last juicy experience. We found them and when we did, Swedish Fish came along for the journey. On our way out, we spotted something you may or may not remember. Mind when I said America has some of the finest minds of our generation? No? Well, we bought Bacon Bowls. I can hardly wait to eat vanilla ice cream from a bowl made of bacon.

I had uncovered Nancy's terrible secret on the drive home, so we sat down to give her an education. She learned the ways of QI, Fry and Laurie, Izzard, Jupitus impersonating Izzard, Bridges, Dee, retsupurae and by far the most important lesson of all, Laurel and Hardy. She barely knows who they are, but it's being remedied, calm those tits of yours.

At Sheba's, we were without the lady herself, who was with her sister. Tree and Debbie were and are fine company though, as we learned about albino lobsters, squirrels, deer and that. Standard night. Soon enough, the gang was back together again, sat watching Sheba eat a jalapeno burger with fries, despite being sick only the night before. Nothing stops this one, really. The burger tasted like wild Heaven though, so I don't blame her at all. We then went to get our own at Carl's Jr. Expensive, but my God, unbelievable. Back at home weighing double our usual, we tried to watch Chronicles of Riddick, but it didn't happen.

"Admit that the waters around you have grown and accept it that soon you'll be drenched to the bone"

In a bit.
SD

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