Saturday, 15 June 2013

Hey Hey, My My


Yes, Comrades

The idea was to go tubing down the Salt River. That didn't happen. Good, glad we got that out of the way. The new idea was to give Wet 'n' Wild a dip. This was after some jollies at her expense, naturally. After getting almost lost, we arrived.

Apart from parents, we seemed to be the OAP(old and putrid)s of the entire visitorship. After the wave pool, a flume, me jumping on my water board to cool my feet and falling like a cunt, going down slides, down one of those halfpipes that put you almost upside down things, a crazy river that nearly tore me bleedin' arms off seriously guys, more wave pool, numerous comments from males and females young and old about my Bikini Bottom bottoms, an argument about the colours of the rainbow (I won) and a churro, we left.

Alice Cooper cooks some fucking big hot dogs. So, we didn't go to his restaurant, we went to Costco's. Bitches running wild (yes thank you I already know shut up). Their all-beef hot dog turned out to be the mutt's nuts as it happens, for dirt cheap too. Think I had a crossed wire at this point for some reason, so we took a hike.

On the long road to our destination, my ear was playing silly buggers again, but not quite clogging. As we neared what we'd came to, I even turned a deaf ear to a Green Day song. Told you I wasn't feeling myself!

We pulled up at the Musical Instrument Museum. Empty as fuck, like my heart upon such realisation. An octobasse (me neither) pretty much floored us from the get go. One of us is Instagramming it up, the other is in possession of a dying camera and is very upset about it. There was a Steinway piano, which they invited visitor virtuosos to play. A fucking Steinway! I made a feeble attempt to harness Her power, but no, not a Steinway. We wandered, we played proper bongos, I found out I may actually have a talent on the harp and we played a theremin. Seriously droogs, check that shit out. Clara Rockmore. Go.

We explored the instruments of the world, which made us feel very small indeed, I found a thing for 1910s Arizonian music, we witnessed a phantom piano concerto like something straight out of Scooby Doo then packed up.

We made a final pit stop to see Sheba, Helly and Debbie, then finished Prometheus (3 stars).

"There's more to the picture than meets the eye"

In a bit.

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